Building a Strong Business Relationship

When it comes to business and sales, building a strong relationship is critical. The stronger your relationship is with your customer, the more likely they will be to refer you business. Every day, make an attempt to build on the relationships you have with your customer. Don’t just say hi as they walk in and goodbye as they leave. The last thing you want to do is make your customer feel like a statistic. Let them know that their business with you is appreciated. Talk to them, strike up a non-business conversation with them. It could involve just about anything, such as the weather, sports, a movie, pets, etc. Non-business conversation puts your customer at ease and gets them talking. The more they talk to you, the more they will open up to you, opening the door for more sales opportunities. Or, you can keep it simple. For starters, get to know you customers by name, than address them by name. Say things such as, “how’s it going today?” Or “how was your weekend?” Or “is there anything I can help you with today?” Make your presence known and felt. Your customer wants to be appreciated, so take a few minutes of your time to show them that you care about them as a customer. Another way to strengthen your relationship with your customer is to keep a Rolodex handy with a list of all of your customers birthday’s, anniversaries, and special events. Keep your eyes and ears open for when customers talk about up coming events in their lives. Such as children’s birthdays and graduations. When the appropriate date approaches, send your customer a card, wether it is a holiday card, a birthday card, a graduation card, or a congratulatory card. Just send it. Your customers will appreciate the fact that you remembered them on their special day. This will only strengthen the relationship you already have with them. There are many reasons to build a strong relationship with your customer, but two of the reasons remain to be key. One main reason is that customers value and appreciate good customer service. They want the piece of mind of knowing that if something ever happened with their product or service, that they would have you to turn to as their go to person. This is extremely important because your customer will have this in mind when your competition moves in to take them away. And believe me, your competition will try to take them away. As long as you provide excellent customer service, your customer will stick with you. There is no substitute for excellent customer service. Customer service is the most important thing to a customer, even more important than fees’. The second reason building relationships are so important is because of the referral process. A customer that is treated with respect and provided excellent customer service will most assuredly refer their family and friends to you. Why wouldn’t they? Your most important asset is your customer, so build and strengthen the foundations you have with them. Buy building strong relationships, you will be building your sales. Good luck. This article may be reproduced by anyone at any time, as long as the authors name and reference links are kept in tact and active. .

Dealing with Difficult People: 27 Secrets & Strategies You Can Apply Today

Copyright 2006 Colleen Kettenhofen

“No one can get your goat if they don’t know where it’s tied up.” Zig Ziglar

1. Listen more effectively. Listening is the number one tool in communication, especially when dealing with difficult people.

2. Step back and analyze the situation from an outside perspective.  When we are less emotionally involved and “cool our jets,” the answers come for how to effectively deal with them. Whether dealing with a difficult boss, dealing with a difficult co-worker, or spouse.

3. Ignoring often doesn’t work. The tension becomes so thick you can cut it with a knife.

4. Choose your battles. There are times when you have to “let it go.” Know when to speak up and when to pick your battles.

5. Criticize in person, praise in public. Never publicly criticize someone as you will look like the bad guy and the difficult person will only become more upset.

6. Maintain respect for them – even if you disagree or dislike them. At least acknowledge what they say. Think about how you would want to be treated.

7. Seek first to understand then to be understood, especially when dealing with difficult people.

8. People often won’t care what you think unless they think you care. At least attempt to see it from their perspective.

9. Maintain high expectations and standards if you are managing this employee. If you don’t do this you will be seen as enabling their unacceptable behavior.

10. Strive for greater communication. Often, it’s not that there isn’t enough communication, it’s that it’s bad communication. So work on improving your conflict resolution skills. If you are a manager, consider training everyone in conflict resolution. One of the main reasons teams fail is because some of the people on the team don’t like each other, or aren’t skilled in handling conflict.

11. Invest in communication skills courses and conflict resolution skills courses to improve the part you can control – you.

12. Don’t lose emotional control. Antagonists and “passive-aggressives” will often try to push your buttons.

13. Avoid being around difficult people when they’re in a bad mood. If they’re always in a bad mood, try being around them when they are in a “better” mood!

14. Accept, change or reject. Know that ultimately you only have three choices.
1) Accept the situation knowing it won’t change. 
2) Attempt to change your relationship with them by changing how you react.
3) If it’s really affecting your well being, it may be time to “reject” the situation and move on.

15.  Avoid "but." No “but’s” allowed!  For example, don’t follow giving them positive reinforcement with, “But on the other hand…” The word “but” only negates everything positive you just said.

16. Non-verbally position yourself at their eye level. For example, if they are sitting when you talk with them, sit. If they are standing, stand. Converse at their level.

17. Avoid the word “need” when possible and use “want” instead. Saying politely and tactfully, “John, I want to have the project in to me by noon so that we’ll meet our deadline. “Want” is more assertive as long as it’s in the right tone.

18. Watch your tone of voice. Avoid an autocratic or sarcastic tone. The Latin root of the word “sarcasm” is “sarco” meaning tearing of the flesh!

19. In face-to-face communication, words account for 7% of what people notice and believe about you. Tone is 38% and body language 55%.  So a full 93% is tone and body language.

20. Give sincere positive reinforcement when they do something well. Show genuine appreciation. Often difficult people are difficult because they feel unappreciated.

21. Avoid absolutes such as, “You always” and “You never.” It puts difficult people further on the defensive.

22. Don’t take it personally. Often they’re difficult because of something going on with them.

23. Watch your mental state. Don’t let them drag you down. A little of that can be normal but don’t allow it to go on.

24. Remember the person who constantly angers you, or constantly intimidates you, controls you.

25. Mutually agree to move on. Agree to disagree. If this isn’t possible, at least “move on” in your own mind.

26. Attempt to understand what’s driving that difficult behavior. Get at the root cause, even if you only try to figure it out in your own mind.

27. E + R = 0. Event + Reaction = Outcome. You can’t control the event, but you can control the outcome based on how you react or respond. Be careful how you respond.

For example, there’s the story of the couple who were divorcing. A neighbor said to the wife, “Do you think you’d ever get back together?” She replied, “No, because we have said things to each other that are so horrible, that even after apologizing they could never be taken back. There's no way we’d get back together.” The moral of the story…be careful what you say. Once those words are out they’re hard to take back.

“The disease of me often results in the defeat of us.” Pat Riley of NBA fame

Building Great Business Relationships

If you’re in a business relationship with anyone – a client, vendor, or customer – how important is that relationship to you? Do you value the relationship? Do you want to nurture it?

A business relationship, like any relationship, is a two-way street. The expectations of both parties needs be clear and easily understandable. Applying the Golden Rule is also a good idea: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” That is a very powerful statement, and one I try to practice in my daily life, both in business and personal matters.

Good communication is key for any business relationship to grow and thrive. Even when conflicts surface (and they will), keeping the lines of communication open at all times is extremely important. Meet conflicts head-on, no matter how frightening they may seem at the time. The sooner the issues are out on the table and dealt with, the sooner you can get back on track and back to business-as-usual.

Another thing to keep in mind is letting people know you appreciate them. Thank you notes, cards and e-mails are always a good idea, and they never go out of style. People love to be appreciated. If you are receiving great business from someone, always be sure to let them know. You will feel better for it, and so will they.

Another great idea is to reach out and “touch” your clients and customers on a regular basis by sending them monthly newsletters. This is a wonderful way to keep in touch, both to let them know you are thinking about them, and to remind them about you as well.

Remember, you get out of a great relationship what you put into it. Value those you do business with. Nurture the relationships, so they are always growing and prospering. Keep this up and you will always have a garden full of healthy, happy business contacts.

Body Language Speaks Louder Than Words

Has it ever occurred to you how much you are saying to people even when you are not speaking? Unless you are a master of disguise, you are constantly sending messages about your true thoughts and feelings whether you are using words or not.

Studies show that your words account for only 7% of the messages you convey. The remaining 93% is non-verbal. 55% of communication is based on what people see and the other 38% is transmitted through tone of voice. So think about it. In the business setting, people can see what you are not saying. If your body language doesn't match your words, you are wasting your time.

Eye contact is the most obvious way you communicate. When you are looking at the other person, you show interest. When you fail to make eye contact, you give the impression that the other person is of no importance. Maintain eye contact about 60% of the time in order to look interested, but not aggressive.

Facial expression is another form of non-verbal communication. A smile sends a positive message and is appropriate in all but a life and death situation. Smiling adds warmth and an aura of confidence. Others will be more receptive if you remember to check your expression.

Your mouth gives clues, too, and not just when you are speaking. Mouth movements, such as pursing your lips or twisting them to one side, can indicate that you are thinking about what you are hearing or that you are holding something back.

The position of your head speaks to people. Keeping your head straight, which is not the same as keeping your head on straight, will make you appear self-assured and authoritative. People will take you seriously. Tilt your head to one side if you want to come across as friendly and open.

How receptive you are is suggested by where you place your arms. Arms crossed or folded over your chest say that you have shut other people out and have no interest in them or what they are saying. This position can also say, "I don't agree with you." You might just be cold, but unless you shiver at the same time, the person in front of you may get the wrong message.

How you use your arms can help or hurt your image as well. Waving them about may show enthusiasm to some, but others see this gesture as one of uncertainty and immaturity. The best place for your arms is by your side. You will look confident and relaxed. If this is hard for you, do what you always do when you want to get better at something - practice. After a while, it will feel natural.

The angle of your body gives an indication to others about what's going through your head. Leaning in says, "Tell me more." Leaning away signals you've heard enough. Adding a nod of your head is another way to affirm that you are listening.

Posture is just as important as your grandmother always said it was. Sit or stand erect if you want to be seen as alert and enthusiastic. When you slump in your chair or lean on the wall, you look tired. No one wants to do business with someone who has no energy.

Control your hands by paying attention to where they are. In the business world, particularly when you deal with people from other cultures, your hands need to be seen. That would mean you should keep them out of your pockets and you should resist the urge to put them under the table or behind your back. Having your hands anywhere above the neck, fidgeting with your hair or rubbing your face, is unprofessional.

Legs talk, too. A lot of movement indicates nervousness. How and where you cross them tells others how you feel. The preferred positions for the polished professional are feet flat on the floor or legs crossed at the ankles. The least professional and most offensive position is resting one leg or ankle on top of your other knee. Some people call this the "Figure Four." It can make you look arrogant.

The distance you keep from others is crucial if you want to establish good rapport. Standing too close or "in someone's face" will mark you as pushy. Positioning yourself too far away will make you seem standoffish. Neither is what you want so find the happy medium. Most importantly, do what makes the other person feel comfortable. If the person with whom you are speaking keeps backing away from you, stop. Either that person needs space or you need a breath mint.

You may not be aware of what you are saying with your body, but others will get the message. Make sure it's the one you want to send.

(c) 2004, Lydia Ramsey. All rights in all media reserved.

Be Curious – And Be A Successful Communicator

There are many ways to improve the way you communicate. For example, you will always start things off on the right foot by opening the conversation in a way that creates mutual respect. Using phrases such as, "If you have a minute, I'd like to talk with you about something that I think will improve the way we work together," helps set your conversation partner at ease. It tells him or her that you have positive intentions.

It is also important to know your purpose for the conversation. Some purposes are more useful than others. A useful purpose is one you have power over. For instance, you can control your own reaction; you can share your view; learn about your partner's view; work toward a sustainable solution.

On the other hand, examples of purposes that are NOT useful are: trying to change the other person; attempting to control their reaction; or going in with a hidden agenda.

Be Interested
Of the many ways to improve your conversation skills, one of the best is to be interested. Curiosity is one of the most useful tools in the communication toolbox. When you enter the conversation with "beginner's mind," you will necessarily adopt the attitude of a learner. You will not have to pretend to ask honest, open questions. They will come naturally. As you listen, you can reflect on what is being said (and not said). You will gain information and ease tension. If you can't think of a question, you can always acknowledge what you've heard, or you can say: "I see, tell me more about that."

One of the reasons we're not curious more often is that we mentally equate curiosity with agreement. We think that if we don't disagree immediately, our conversation partner will assume we're okay with whatever he is saying. This is not useful thinking. It prevents you from seeing the whole picture and from learning where your partner is coming from.

The next time you find yourself in a difficult conversation, give yourself and your partner a gift by asking questions - questions to which you do not know the answer. Watch what happens. You will learn a lot, and you will feel more powerful, not less. Remember – listening does not equal agreement. It means you are a skilled and active learner, a good partner, and a conscious communicator. Live, learn, and enjoy the moment.

Good luck and good communication!

How do I communicate with my virtual assistant?

A very valid question but also a very easy one to answer. First, you must remember that your professional virtual assistant is a human being, just like you, and just like someone who may sit in the office right next to you. She has feelings, morals, standards, kids, pets, and a life - just like you. While I can't speak for other virtual staffing agencies, at Team Double-ClickSM, we go to great pains to be sure our clients can communicate directly and openly with their virtual assistants. This ability is vitally important to any business relationship and especially that of a businessperson and his or her assistant. Without that communication, there is no exchange of ideas and tasks. We do monitor communication between our virtual staff and our clients, but this is simply the mechanics of our business model in motion. We monitor these communications to first be sure the communications are there and second so that we can step in if we spot a problem or see something that can be done more efficiently. However, we encourage our clients to get to know their virtual assistants on a personal level as well. As with any relationship, the better you know one another, the better you'll be able to anticipate one another's moves, needs, and pet peeves. Now that the "why" is out of the way, we can talk about the "how". Of course, there are several options for communicating tasks, assignments, and other matters to your virtual assistant: E-Mail is a very effective mode of communication when working virtually. It allows you to quickly attach a file and send it to your virtual assistant so that she may make changes, print a letter and mail it, or keep it as a reference. Be sure to talk to our Client Services Rep Denise Schrock or your virtual administrative assistant if you need help attaching and sending files. Using the telephone to communicate with your virtual assistant, while obvious is quite underutilized and so simple to do. Tired of looking up your virtual assistant's phone number each time? Simply program her phone number into your office phones and cell phone's speed dial. One-touch dialing your virtual administrative assistant is a snap and no harder than buzzing a bricks-and-mortar assistant in the next room Instant messenger is another example of a wonderful technology, which is underutilized when it comes to communicating with virtual assistants. There are several excellent instant messaging programs and they're so easy to use. IM programs to check out: Yahoo: http://messenger.yahoo.com MSN: http://im.live.com/messenger/im/home/?source=MSNTDLINK AOL: http://www.aim.com ICQ: http://www.icq.com With an instant messaging program you can, with just a couple clicks of the mouse, type messages back and forth with colleagues and your virtual assistant - all in real time. You type, she types, and before you know it, the questions you and she had are all answered and you can move on. Caution - time wasting opportunity: It's easy to get hooked into "chatting" with someone on IM, which can soak up a lot of time. IM should be used for quick questions and quick answers, and then back to your tasks. IM was not meant to take the place of the telephone for giving lengthy instructions or holding very involved e-versations. Snail mail, while very retro, it is sometimes necessary. With so many technologies at our fingertips these days, there's very little use for snail mail except for the most formal of business communications, marketing mailings, or sending supplies to your virtual assistant. Faxing your virtual assistant is also a popular means of communicating tasks and lists to your professional virtual assistant. However, if the items you're intending to send via fax are in electronic (editable) format already - it's best to send it as a file attachment. That way your virtual assistant doesn't need to retype everything and spend unnecessary client dollars. Check out eFax at www.efax.com for the latest in electronic faxing - there's almost no need for a landline fax anymore. VOIM (voice over instant messenger) is my new favorite communications toy. What VOIM allows you to do is simply pull up your instant messaging program, click your virtual assistant's name, click the call button, and voila, it rings through the computer to her. Once the connection is established (which only takes a second or two) you can talk with your virtual assistant through the computer - no phone line involved). You can then quickly delegate tasks, give instructions, or ask questions without stopping to look up her phone number, and without typing out a lengthy email. At Team Double-ClickSM, we've begun implementing the Yahoo! VOIM program and with wonderful results. If you'd like to give it a try, go to http://messenger.yahoo.com and download the software - it's ridiculously easy to use and best of all, it's free! Just keep in mind that VOIM will only work with other people who download the newest version of the Yahoo! software and have a microphone and speakers on their computer. There are many great ways to communicate needs, likes, dislikes, tasks, and training to your virtual assistant. It's all a matter of personal preference and what you're most comfortable using. Professional virtual assistants are flexible and will be happy to use whatever mode of communication you prefer. As technology advances even further, well, who knows how we'll be communicating next year or even next month!